Not too long ago, I fell victim to a TikTok prank: getting Kraft singles thrown at my car. ‘Cheesed’ if you will.
If you’ve also been cheesed and are wondering what your options are for cleaning your car…keep reading. But seriously, why do people do this?
While this isn’t a post I ever thought I would write, I thought I’d have some fun and break down a couple of options for removing it based on my experience here at Carwash Country.
In this blog post, I’ll cover a couple of ways to remove sliced cheese from your car.
First, try to remove the cheese before it dries
If the cheese is still relatively fresh, it’s best to remove it immediately before it has a chance to dry.
Once the slices are removed, you should be able to wipe any residue away pretty easily with most auto detailing sprays.
I like to use a very basic water-soluble detailer for this. Nothing with wax, just a clear instant detailer that can help remove the cheese. You can then use your preferred wax or sealant if desired.
If you aren’t at home, most convenience stores sell small spray bottles of instant detailer that you can use to clean things up using a soft cloth.
You can also use dish soap and water. The idea here is to wipe the cheese off using a slippery soap or detailing spray to avoid friction and scratching.
Removing dried cheese from your car
If you have cheese that’s dried, things get a little trickier. Since wiping it off isn’t an option, I’d recommend a bug and tar remover in combination with a microfiber towel.
These products are ideal for stuck-on substances when used carefully. In general, you’ll want to use any product with cleaning properties and use enough of it.
You never want to apply extreme pressure to a stuck-on substance when dry, but a little careful agitation after soaking it for a couple of seconds with something like a bug and tar remover can do the trick.
Avoid using paper towels
Avoid paper towels whenever trying to remove substances like dried cheese or candy, as it increases the likelihood that you will leave behind faint scratches.
While some are softer than others, they are essentially wood fibers at a microscopic level.
Also, avoid using plastic knives or other objects unless absolutely necessary. Again, it’s just cheese so most of this stuff should be able to remove pretty easily if you’re careful.
Is cheese dangerous to a car’s paint or clear coat?
For the most part, no. While it can leave a greasy substance behind, it’s not anything that will permanently damage your clear coat. If the plastic backing is still on the cheese, just be careful, especially when dried.
You can use a very mild compound followed by a polish after the fact if the cheese was dry (and then removed) if you notice signs of residue that won’t go away.
With polishes and compounds, you are basically gradually removing a very tiny amount of clear coat in order to remove imperfections your eye perceives as scratches.
This is perfectly okay when done professionally and in moderation, so keep that in mind.
Not sure what the differences are in products like polishes, compounds, or glazes? Check out a post I wrote that compares 7 different common products in detailing, and what they’re used for.
Luckily, sliced cheese is something relatively harmless and not too difficult to remove for the most part!
The most important thing to remember is to remove it as soon as possible and if dried, proceed with caution using plenty of lubrication.
If the situation is severe (like if someone used several slices), you may want to contact a good local detailer who has experience in paint correction and exterior detailing specifically.
Hope it helps!